I walked her in that first week of school half thrilled beyond words at the adventure she was embarking on, half scared out of my skin of leaving my 5 year old in the care of another all.day.long. She shared my mixture of emotions, I could see it on her face. Reluctantly she let go of the leg she was clutching as I said goodbye. That was 342 days ago. We’ve come so far.

I met with her teacher at the end of this year. Being a first-time public school mom, I wondered what I must do over the summer to make sure she didn’t forget all that she learned throughout the year. “She won’t forget. I promise you,” her teacher assured, “She is so ready for first grade.”

“But does she focus? I mean, really focus in class?” I probed. “Because at home I can’t make her steady her eyes on anything for more than a minute, if that.” Her eyes widened. “Oh, I wish you could see her in class. She is so focused. She is doing so well,” she assured me again.

I left the year of public school, my girl’s first and mine {as a parent} with a wonderful feeling of pleasure and satisfaction. She did it. We did it. She can read and add numbers and she made friends. She played and created and had a blast. It was an incredible experience for us both.

I just shared our amazing public school experience with Kindergarten. Kindergarten. It’s only the beginning, I know. I’m not naive to think every year will be this close to perfect. But I am hopeful.

I am without a doubt, completely, totally, 100% called to be a public school mom. As I walk through those halls, displaying clocks reminiscent of the ones I watched as recess called. . .as I breathe in the public school air filled with scents of freshly sharpened pencils and library books, I truly feel at home. I know it’s where we are supposed to be.

Not all moms can say this, I know. Some are called to private school, sporting crisp, clean uniforms with sharp logos. And many are called to education in the home, where constant dedication and diligence allow parents to directly guide the education of their family. And there is no right or wrong. As long as we are walking the path we feel is best for our family, we are doing right by our kids.

As a mother so passionate and dedicated to the public school system, it is challenging and sometimes frustrating to see anti-public education propaganda slide through my Facebook feed. Politicians, parents, and sometimes teachers are throwing their hands and their words in the air in opposition to new standards, testing and methods used in today’s classroom. And I get it. There are so many things that could be better, that need to be better. And many just want their voice to be heard.

But what are we accomplishing by distributing fear-mongering material through often unchecked sources? How are we truly making a difference by simply shouting all that is wrong with the system?

I’ve read article after article on Common Core standards. I sat with my daughter’s principal to ask questions for my own good and the good of those I might encourage with my knowledge. And I could report, based on my findings that Common Core is simply a set of standards. That it isn’t the hard-core curriculum that some would accuse. I could tell you that the effects of Common Core are largely dependent on your state, local school system, administrators and teachers. And all that would be true. But maybe not.

I could share that standardized testing is important and necessary {and I believe it is} but that I understand a parent’s aversion to it. I could agree that some of the methods for teaching math these days seem completely crazy. I could point out the recommended texts that I would not want my kids to read and tell you that I trust they will be given alternate options at my request. And all that would be true. But maybe not.

Because it’s all largely based on opinion and my unique experience. Your experience may be very different than mine. I have a friend who is a principal in the metro area of our city. As I sat and listened to him share his experience as the leader of a middle school filled with 40+ cultures and languages, I realized his needs are vastly different than those of our suburban county schools. And in this way, it is frustrating that some believe the answer is conformity. But on the flip side, with so many variables to consider, how can a team of educational leaders lead so many different atmospheres without some form of continuity of standard and expectation? Whether we believe education should be lead on a federal or local level, the issue remains the same.

Education, like healthcare and immigration law or {insert issue here}, is constantly evolving in this country. And as much as I don’t like the state of many of our hot-point political issues, I don’t feel equipped or responsible to fight the battles. There are some that do. Leaders, politicians and parent activists that will go to bat for our classrooms. They are battling this out on our behalf as I write this. My biggest responsibility and what should be my greatest concern, is to support those in leadership that share my views on the issues. That is the political foundation this country was build upon.

But we are so afraid of conspiracy on the part of our government. Believe me, I’ve seen enough prime-time dramas to know there is so much more going on behind the scene than I could ever handle. But why are we more cynical about our government than we are about the crazy news outlets that publish most of the fear-mongering education nonsense we share? Why is it so easy to believe the negative chatter than to believe the hard-working folks in the trenches of education?

I know the system is flawed. I know there’s more to it than I can see. But I cannot allow my response to what I suspect be fight or flight. As a parent, I need to take my place of ownership over my children’s education. I need to take my place of pride on the sidelines of our schools, cheering on my kids, their teachers, their administrators and their friends.

Earlier this month I wrote a post about entitlement that resonated with a lot of people. In it I said,

I will recognize the fact that it’s a blessing we have the freedom to choose our form of education, and for the most part, the public sector is doing the best it can with what its got. We are not entitled to have others give our kids a prestigious or perfect education. As parents we are the only ones responsible to make sure our kids get the education we want them to have.

I am responsible for my children’s education.

We are responsible for our children’s education. For some parents, that means choosing an alternate form of schooling through private or homeschool. For me, it means knowing what to do with what I know.

So what do we do with Common Core?

So what do we do with Common Core? Where do we go from here? Well I don’t know about you. . .because the choice is so personal. It’s about your family, your unique experience and what is right for you. But here’s what I’m choosing to do. I am making these choices to help my kids win in public school, to help our schools win in the midst of political turmoil and to help our family win by adopting a positive outlook on school and on life.

I’m choosing to get over my feelings of entitlement. To choose gratitude for the blessing of education in every form. As I searched for images to use in this post, as most bloggers do, I searched key words such as “classroom” and “public school.” About 80% of the images that came up were of school settings in Africa and Asia. And they were beautiful. Lovely images of children learning in dusty classrooms with rickety furniture and dirt floors. I was struck by the reality that those people celebrate the education they get. They feel honored and privileged. And we go over there and we photograph it. We beautify it because we are so proud that we are helping them learn and grow.

But what of our own education? It’s not celebrated because it’s broken, imperfect? Isn’t theirs celebrated because despite it’s imperfections and flaws it’s appreciated and therefore beautiful?

I am responsible for my children’s education and that means allowing them to see me celebrate it, despite it’s flaws, with gratitude. It means getting over the feeling that I am entitled to perfection and helping to make it the best it can be in every situation.

I’m choosing to take ownership of my children’s education. That means making a well-informed determination of what is best for our family. It means not reading every crazy article or post that floats through my Facebook feed or at least, learning to discern what is truth and what is fear-based opinion. It means staying on top of changes in standards and policy through reputable and trusted sources as well as hands-on experience and relationship with teachers and leaders.

I’m choosing to walk confidently in our decision. Not judging those around me for choosing differently. Knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that we are walking the path that is best for our family allows me to leave fear and judgement behind. It gives me the peace necessary to face every educational encounter with wisdom and discernment.

I’m choosing to determine where my place is in working toward reform. Am I called to be a parent activist, responsibly serving to better the educational system in our country? Or am I called to quietly serve on the local level, helping teachers and administrators in our area?

I am choosing to champion our teachers and our schools by being as involved as possible. I will serve with gratitude, knowing the best outcome, no matter what the standards, is to work together. I will acknowledge that while educational shifts may be challenging for me and my kids, they are so challenging for teachers and leaders as well. By walking hand in hand with them as they educate my child, I’m communicating support and gratitude that will honor them and hopefully fuel their passion for education.

I am choosing to show my kids that sometimes things in life are less than ideal. Crazy math problem? Tough teacher? Difficult standardized test? We’ll face it together, working hard, addressing problems with the right attitude and respectfully dealing with bumps in the road.

I’m choosing to be involved. . .to be present. . .to ask questions and build relationships with our teachers and administrators so that if and when I do come up against something I don’t like, I can address it on a foundation of trust and respect. I will believe the best about the people giving their lives to public education. Teachers, administrators, staff members. . .they are tirelessly serving our kids every.single.day. Will we encounter a less than ideal teacher along they way? Maybe. We’ll deal with it as it comes.

I’m choosing not to worry about the future, taking it one year at a time. A good friend once told me, “Don’t borrow trouble.” I’m not doing myself or my children any good by worrying about the future. My mantra with education is One Year at a Time. I don’t know what will happen with our family or with our educational system next year let alone when my kids are in high school. Common Core could be gone or vastly different in the years to come. My focus will always be the here and now. What do we do with where we are? What are we called to NOW?

My sweet mom never really learned to use a computer to its full potential before she passed away last year. It frustrated her that she couldn’t just do things the way she’d always done them. The progress was a source of confusion and frustration. She tried, bless her heart, but she often shut down before pressing through to the next level of proficiency. Change is hard. When we are presented a new way of doing things we tend to shut down, resisting the transformation.

Whatever we believe about the motivation of our government or it’s lack when it comes to education, there is a helpful or destructive way to respond. It’s our choice. It won’t always be easy as I guide my children, with their best interest at heart, but I will choose to remain positive for their sake and for the sake of those who serve us daily. We read and talk about education reform but I am challenging us to take the first step in parent reform. Let’s reform our response and maybe, just maybe, it will be the first step towards a system where everyone wins.

What has been your response to Common Core and current educational standards? How can you take a more positive approach?

Photo Credit: Flickr | Jinx!