From the Heart of a Pediatrician Mom

{Today’s post is from Dr. Andrea Johnston, co-author of The Baby Companion book and a pediatrician mom. I am thrilled to be sharing her heart for the book with you today. As we’ve said before, it’s all about grace and balance. Everything you need will flow out of that place.}

I never thought I would help write a parenting book. When asked by Jessica to co-write the follow-up to The Pregnancy Companion, I first thought it would just be a neat way to help out a friend. As we’ve worked on the book this past year, though, it has come to mean more than that to me. I see new parents every day in my office struggling with decisions about how to care for their child. I see the agony over even minor decisions affecting their child’s care. How do you make sure you do everything right as a parent?

The bottom line is, parents always just want to do the “right” thing. The great news is that most of the time there isn’t just one right answer. There are very few absolutes when it comes to parenting. For example, you should absolutely never shake a baby. This is a nonnegotiable that I don’t think anyone could argue against. For most other issues in pediatrics, however, there is a huge range of what is acceptable and best for baby.

As a new parent, you will see impassioned books, blogs, and online postings from people telling you that your child will suffer irreversible damage for these minor decisions. You’ll feel as though you’ve been branded with the words “world’s worst parent” if you do not go along with whatever their soapbox belief is. Especially on hot topics like circumcision, breastfeeding, vaccines, and co-sleeping, there is a mountain of information, and those who feel the strongest tend to be the loudest.

For those hot-button issues, you must decide what is best for your family and your baby. I will give you the information in this book that I believe is the most current and accurate from a medical standpoint. I will offer suggestions about daily choices that might help make the first year a little easier. But in the long run, does it really matter whether you choose to give your child a pacifier or not? Does it really matter whether you wean the bottle at exactly one year or not? The simple answer is no.

The Baby Companion book is about reassuring you. You are a good parent. You love your child more than anyone else in the world, and you are doing your best. Will every day be perfect? Of course not. Will you let your ten-month-old watch TV from time to time so you can go to the bathroom. Probably! Don’t let these things define you as a parent.

The book contains fundamental medical information and what to expect each month of baby’s first year. Each child is different, and your child’s doctor may have different recommendations based on your child’s unique circumstances. Use this book as a guide to formulate your own questions for your baby’s doctor. Above all, trust yourself as a parent and always ask for help when you need it.

Moms, what has been your biggest need during your child’s early years? What do you wish you would have known then?