Last month we honored National Child Abuse Prevention Month by introducing you to the organization, Stop Abuse and our dear friend Simon. We talked about the importance of empowering our children to protect themselves against sexual abuse. We shared staggering statistics and promised to help guide families to address this important topic. The latest media craze regarding Josh Duggar has only confirmed to us how important it is to empower and protect our children against child sexual abuse.
We are not interested in discussing the Duggar family here. Our thoughts and prayers go out to them as they navigate through this valley. We cannot imagine what has, is and will go on behind the scenes of their public lives and we have no place to share opinion on or insight into it.
This situation is not an opportunity to mount our soap boxes and judge Josh Duggar or his family. This isn’t our ticket to explaining why reality TV is ridiculous or Christians in the media are hypocrites. The Duggar situation should be nothing but a wake up call to parents that child sexual abuse is an epidemic. It’s a reality to be dealt with and one that according to current statistics, will hit home for many of us. {Reports indicate that 1 in 4 girls and 1 in 7 boys will have experienced sexual abuse by the time they are 18 years of age. – U.S. Department of Justice, National Sex Offender Public Website, 2014}
Learn the Facts about Child Sexual Abuse
{source: Darkness to Light’s Stewards of Children}
- Most child victims never report sexual abuse
- 90% of children who are victims of sexual abuse know their abuser
- 30% of children who are sexually abused are abused by family members
- 60% of children who are sexually abused are abused by people the family trusts
- 40% of children who are sexually abused are abused by older and more powerful children
Empower Children to be Protected
- Minimize opportunity
- 80% of abuse happens in one on one, isolated situations.
- Eliminate or reduce these situations, make sure interactions can be observed and interrupted.
- Analyze the environment and anticipate situational risks
- Talk about it and give your children permission to “tell”
- Empower your children by talking about private parts and inappropriate touch
- Give your child permission, no matter what, to tell you when something isn’t right
- Tell your child that an unsafe adult may threaten them or convince them it is a game
- One of your best protections is your relationship with your child, make sure they feel they can tell you anything
- Recognize the signs
- Physical signs are not common but may appear
- Anxiety, stomach pain or headaches may occur
- Emotional or behavioral signals are more common
- Nightmares, bedwetting, falling grades, aggression and self harm may be signs of abuse
- Sexual behavior or language that are not age appropriate can be a signal of abuse
Awareness + Education + Empowerment + Love
Collective silence has caused grave damage to millions of children, and has long protected the abuser. Together, we can do a much better job of learning about an insidious form of abuse and teach kids to better protect themselves.
Stop Abuse was formed in 1986 to prevent child sexual abuse through education, detection and referral. Through its research-based Emmy award-winning marionette program, Simon Says, ‘Just Tell’ schoolchildren from kindergarten through grade 5 learn to recognize, prevent anddisclose abuse in a safe environment.
So what do we do now?
Instead of spending our time and emotions reading, posting or chatting about all that is wrong with the Duggar situation, let’s instead focus that energy on our own families. When we empower our children to protect themselves against sexual abuse we are fighting this epidemic from within the sanctity of our home and family.
Visit the Stop Abuse website and check out their program and other resources. Find out how you can bring the Simon Says, ‘Just Tell’ program to your school, church or organization.
Consider giving a donation to help support this critical effort to protect children.
Begin talking with your kids about their bodies and give them permission to tell you whenever someone does something that makes them uncomfortable.
Introduce your children to Simon. Simon is the courage that lives in the hearts of children everywhere. Simon says, “If someone touches you in a way that you don’t like, tell someone – a teacher, a counselor or a parent. Just tell! Don’t be afraid. No one, including friends or relatives has the right to touch you in ways you don’t like.”
Download the Stop Abuse Parent Guide for helpful information, insight and talking points to empower your family.
Are you having the hard conversations that empower your child to protect themselves against child sexual abuse? What steps are you taking in your family?
Photo | DuggarFamily.com
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